I can't complete a sentence, but truth be told I

I know exactly how I’d win.

See, I’d show up, take ALL OF THE PICTURES, and then I’d leave without even competing. The competition itself would be below me, plus I already won. I’d give them my address for them to mail the trophy later, but there’s no need because of course they’d already have my address. Everyone has my address. Not to mention they’ll be too busy presenting the trophy on a royal fucking platter to mail anything.